i get emotional

Published May 24, 2011 by veryjaneeyre

I really need to stop reading !angst fanfic.

The truly good ones break my heart over and over to the point where I’m sobbing and wondering if it’ll ever end happily. Sometimes they don’t. The latest work torturing me can be found here. It’s a Kames future!fic. And to make matters worse, it’s a work in progress. If you get sucked into this story, it’s not my fault; just be forewarned that it’s up to 23 (lengthy) chapters as of the writing of this blog. This is also why I have days where I read nothing but fluff. Mostly Jagan, sometimes Kogan- it heals my heart.

Speaking of healing, Blue very nearly bumped into me several days ago. I’m almost certain that it was on purpose. “One of these days, you will knock me down,” I reminded him.

“I know,” he responded. I know. Granted it was book-ended by apologies, but still, I know? Dude, you acted with more concern when I tripped over my own two feet and now that you come close to being the cause of my injuries, it’s like you’d prefer that. As if it’s not bad enough that he has me hesitating before I approach doors, lest he should be on the other side about to barrel through.

He gave me a funny look a few days prior to that after I mentioned that I know firsthand that crying while driving doesn’t work so well. I thought he wasn’t listening, don’t really care if he was, but he should know after all these years that I tend to get emotional at inappropriate times.

Surprisingly, I held it together when one of my friends went through a medical crisis in front of me recently. I never thought I could be so calm in such a scary situation. Maybe I couldn’t actually hold it together for long, because I managed to get myself into a car accident a few hours later. And no, I wasn’t crying at the time. Thankfully, it wasn’t serious, but it has impacted my driving confidence. Gah. I’ve started driving like I’m 70 hoping that I won’t be involved in the same kind of accident.

I just want my life to calm back down. Is that too much to ask??

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